suicidal

recap recap recap.. yesterday had lesson for a pathetic 2hours! group meeting cancelED n no tutorials. so, end school @ 2PM. but i had to stay out till 6plus. so pj decided to accompany me to PS to shop. we went to shop n shop and i bought a short, leggings and long sleeve. *loves* saw a bag which is kinda nice. but din't get it. = so hopefully dis sat when i go out, i can find something niceR *finger cross* so after shop, we ate. pj left after eating n i went to meet that hafiy! argh! i will NEVER meet him in de train ever again! HAH! so well, met dearest ling at dhoby ghaut and we were off to orchard to meet SAM SAM! ouh yeah. samantha soh. uhh.. it had been long since ive met her. years i tell you! so we slacked at cineleisure and we ate a sinful desert @ crepes and creame. omg! lava brownie is so damn delicious! ouh, n fattening. -_-' after eating, met rhoma. and dis guy also another long lost friend of mine. eish. was nice to see all four of them la! =)) so we were off to a game of pool. lost to ling but i WON to hafiy!! ouhyeah. i won to hafiy! hafiy dont be sad, you just SUCK!! haha. kiding.=P ended game at 9 and left orchard for home sweet home! was damn tired and de fact dat i have to wake up early in de morning de next day. i still talk to ling! haha. dont know y we still feel like talkin. ling da rindu nisa ekh?? nisa tau.. blush2. we just cant stop talking la. hah! slept after putting down de fone. zZzZ

2day was very reluctant to wake up for class. but thank god i went! lecture was on an SAQ Qn. how lucky can i be? VERY! heE! so lect was on self-destruction or as everyone knows it, suicide! do you know, dieting is a part of suicide? but at de most bottom la of course. =P hmm. suicide ideation is a thought of commiting suicide. n i think almost everyone have ever though of it la right. even i do? n i still clearly remeber that moment. everyone in life just dissapered. i had problems with that current BF. we had major problems n i swear it sucks! ling was'nt talking to me too cause she say my behaviour have change. so none of my closest friends n ppl were not dere for me. n to top it off. my family was also having trouble with me. so with no social support and everyone making me feel like im a TOOT, i couldn't take it any longer. all day long, i thought of suicide. even when im out, i kept thinking if i were not to be in this world, is so much beta for everyone. so i really had a plan n was in a process. but during that moments, thank god, allah came to rescue me. i could hear someone talking to me and telling me to stop what i was doing n just pray. so i did, n i manage to buck up everything. i really thank god for rescuing me that day. =)) manage to solve everything, n thank god you guys still see me in one piece today.=)) ouh well, so much for suicidal ideation. ouhouh. n i did (for fun) de SAD person scale according to that time. n i was suprisingly was at moderate risk. omg!! = ok enough of suicide b4 i start to weep. ok, nisa to emo la. *_* well, after class we had this long 4hours break! ouh gosh! so we had nothing to do, so slept n played eileen's psp n played joey's nitendo! ok! i am so thinking of getting a nitendo la! its so fun. like old school masak-masak like that. FUN i tell you! =P k suda, so we had electives. so for mine, is entrepreneurship! ouh such fun.. me n my group are so confident with our business. lecturer was happy! thank goD! so i suppose that's what business is. you just got to be confident with your business! hakx.